haters , friends and Allah . :')
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim .
(I'm hoping to write all these with a sincere heart)
So this lately , I'm kinda having bad days .
people hurt my best friends and I'm totally upset about it .
it's not like I'm over-dramatic or what so ever ,
but I loved them wholeheartedly .
I'm kind of protective with everyone that I loved ,
so I'm willing to do anything for them .
Sometime in a good way but sometime it could be bad enough .
At some point , I know I made mistakes .
I probably shouldn't cursing . We're on the right side .
Allah's with us . We should just be patient .
Because there's gonna be thousand of good reason behind all these .
I'm praying the best for my friends and myself . :')
Relating to this matter ,
there's a lot of people who seems unsatisfied with me .
It's okay if they said bad things about me .
It's okay since I've been facing haters from the very beginning .
But what I hate very much is that ,
when I do a mistake people would relate it with my mum .
What the heck huh ? It's always gonna be that way when I got into Sepintar .
I'm actually feel pity for their parents .
It's like they were blaming their parents for having
those bad attitudes , low minded and mean heart .
It's inherited from your parents huh ? If that the case , it doesn't apply to me .
Nope at all . I'm independent . I do everything on my own decision .
And all these while I could be patient .
I could ignore , keep it to myself and get better soon enough .
But not this time . I had enough . School's over .
And they were far from the title 'friends' to me .
So why don't they take care of their own business and clean their dirty hearts .
It's annoying when people keep judging me when they knew only few things bout me .
But what can I say . I had all the attentions since I was a little kid , I'm loved easily .
So I guess that's why I was hated so easily too .
I'm not proud of it , and it's a real bother . I'm not being "perasan" okay .
After all , that's what all my best-boy-friends said when I told the story .
I tried to walk away from every single person
that I've ever known in Sepintar including them .
But they gave me advices and I realised how they meant a lot to me .
"Mulut manusia kita tak bole nak tutup . sabar eh .
If u think that the best choice , just do it . I'll support u from behind . okay ? :)"
"Dorang jeles tu ieqa. Sebab dorang takde ape yang kau ada ,
kau ad mak kat skola kot . kau ada ramai org minat , kau pndai , byk lg"
"aku tak suka ieqa aku macam ni . aku kenal ieqa aku macamana . dia kuat .
don't ever put yourself away from us . Okay ? I'm begging you "
"kau ada rovers , kau ada orang lain lagi . so sabar ye .
kalau dah tak tahan sangat , nak maki sgt , just text aku. nak maki aku pun takpe .
as long as jgn public ya ? aku taknak org slh aggp and kutuk kau (':"
"aku jeles dgn kau snanye , sbb kau dpt ujian bsar cmni . Allah syg ko sgt2 .
Allah tahu niat hati kau nak berubah . sbb tu Dia bg ujian ni .
bole hapuskn dosa2 ko sblum ni slagi mana kau sbar . kau patut bsyukur ad ujian ni .
at least kau nmpk yg xsume org yg blaja agme tu akhlak diorang btol ."
terharu gilaa okay . :'))
how could I let them go , when they've given me spirit to stay strong ? :'(
no , I couldn't . I wouldn't . I'm gonna be myself back , be okay ,
because my world it's not only about me , it's about everyone around me too .
I don't have to be selfish just because of haters .
Sorry and thanks my dear friends , yusuf , aiman , husaini , saedan , safwan , amirul . :')
and I realised Allah love me so much that He kept testing me ,
trying to make me become stronger .
so I have to be patient just the way he wanted to , the way he expecting me to do .
I'm totally touched . :'(( I want to love my dear lord the way he loved me too .
I will try my best to face everything the right way and changing for him . :')
and Allah let kak Maria Elena reply my tweet
which makes me so happy n becoming stronger too . :"D
Actually , she had her own story .
here :)
May Allah bless her for being sincere and strong enough . :')
I'm not saying I am innocent .
I've committed a lot of sins . I know when I did wrong .
But what's the point talking behind ? I can handle myself .
I don't need anyone trying to make me feel worst and further away from my lord .
